It grabs you, because you have no choice, if its in you.  It takes you hold as if to never let you go.  It fills your heart with the most important thing, because it is what it is about.  What is it I speak of reader, the spirit, true meaning of Christmas.

I came to Europe fully expecting to hate the holiday.  And I started to.  I refused to say the words or to even acknowledge the joy, the surroundings because I was so caught up in the feeling of missing out, that I forgot something.  I didn’t miss out..because it grabs you, you do not grab it!  When its truly in you…you have no choice and that is the Spirit of Christmas.

I found myself smiling at everyone, especially those that frowned.  I bought a dozen roses to hand out to perfect strangers because I needed more smiles and more hugs.  And I found, that when I handed these roses to these unsuspecting receivers, thier smile, overwhelmingly genuine!  The thing of happiness, the thing that makes each of us melt in our hearts, that smile of appreciation or more so, of being just thought of.

So I found myself alone on Christmas eve, and at first I was very unopened to the idea.  I was feeling as if the care had left the world where I was concerned.  But then I remembered something.  The spirit of Christmas is everywhere and it does not only go where there are many, but it goes where there are few or one.  It found me and it grabbed me as if I were no longer of my own free will.  And it entered my heart and filled it the same as every year before!

I got my jeans on, my boots, my scarf and gloves and jacket and I took a walk to the sea.  The lights of my surroundings were so beautiful.  I had never seen something as beautiful in such a place.  My walk was not alone, I had the spirit of Christmas with me…finally I let this rider take control.  The Spirit of Christmas was where it was always supposed to be, in my very being, in my heart and in my soul!

I found myself at a pub after my walk, Ma Nolan’s Irish Pub.  It was great, there was a lovely live band and I felt good.  I soon had a couple gentleman join my table and the topic of conversation…appreciate your struggle, each day each moment with no regrets.  This is not to say you can not hate every moment of it, as when Jesus was on the mountain, did he not beg God to take it away.  This is ok, you can hate what you are going through, but you must go through it.  You have to go through it, it is responsible for who you become.  No matter the journey, no matter the struggle, big or small, horrific or wonderful, there is something , even the smallest minut thing, you need it to be who you are.  So appreciate what your situation is, with no regret.  Step out side of it for a brief moment every once in a while to remind yourself, that God or who or what ever you believe in, does not give you or let happen to you what you can not handle.

This entity may not have chosen it for you, as man has free will, but, he will not prevent it from happening because he sees how character that you can use that builds you to who you are tomorrow,  comes of it.  This philosophical discussion, it was led by yours truly, on the things I have learn each and everyday on my short journey thus far.  And as I spoke, I heard outside my own voice, reminding me to keep going…to keep trodding through.  The waters are so clear now, nothing muddy in my path, not as before.  Clearity is being reached and my mind fully open to what the possibilities may be.

Do you know how it feels when your heart is so very open.  I thought I loved deeply before!  No …my heart at this very moment, pounds for love of life.  Its as if coming home.  That feeling of excitement that feels your whole entire body when you have been away, and you realize in a few short moments you are about to be home, to see those that you long for more than life its self!  That feeling, those tingles up and down your back, that feeling you get when you love so deeply, so purely!

And it feels good, and its because I let it happen.  I stopped fighting reader, and it snuck up on me because I do believe I gave it a tremendous fight!  Yes, I did I fought it completely with all my might reader, every bit of my being I rejected what was to happen, and then it did, all on its own.  And that is how it works.  That is how clearity is reached, that is how you grow!

Thank you spirit of Christmas for reaching into my deep darkness at such a pivotal point in my life, what ever could be a better Christmas gift than this?  Embrace your struggles reader, embrace them, they are your gift from this thing we call life!  

Joyeux Noel, Feliz Navidad, Craciun Fericit, Merry Christmas!!!